


This is a Hale of a Lot Easier in Theory

by ash_mcj



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alpha Derek Hale, Asking Out, Cora Hale is a Little Shit, Derek Hale Has a Crush on Stiles Stilinski, Feelings Realization, First Dates, Fluff and Humor, Getting Together, Hale Family Feels, Malia Tate is a Hale, Multi, Nervous Derek Hale, Pack Family, Peter Hale is a Little Shit, Pining Derek, Stiles Stilinski Has a Crush on Derek Hale, Texting, The Hales Adopt Isaac Lahey, The Hales Love Stiles Stilinski
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-18 23:00:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28874973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ash_mcj/pseuds/ash_mcj
Summary: [Derek just wants to ask Stiles on a date...somehow it turns into a Hale Pack effort]“So, where are we?” Isaac asked, looking over Derek's shoulder at the phone screen.“I told him to just say ‘Let’s get dinner’, but Cora apparently thought it was too aggressive,” Peter filled them in.“You’re supposed to ask him to dinner, not tell him to dinner,” Malia agreed.“Well, what am I supposed to say, then?” Derek asked, deleting the words he’d typed into the text box.“Just go with the other one you said. Ask, ‘Do you want to get dinner?’” Cora encouraged.“Yeah, that’s perfect,” Isaac said.Derek typed it into the phone, then held it out for everyone to proof-read it.“Now you sound kinda like a pussy,” Isaac pointed out.“What the fuck, guys? This is so dumb,” Derek growled, deleting the message again.
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Isaac Lahey/Malia Tate
Comments: 37
Kudos: 471





	This is a Hale of a Lot Easier in Theory

**Author's Note:**

> It's 5AM and I just got the sudden urge to write this??

Maybe it was the borderline _ridiculous_ amount of times Derek and Stiles had saved each other over the past few years.

Maybe it was the startling realization that Derek genuinely missed his annoying rambling while he was at college this last semester. He never thought he’d see the day, but his loft was just too quiet during those long months. He distinctly recalled how much he once loved the quiet...he wasn’t sure when that had changed.

The reason for the revelation didn’t really matter --Derek liked Stiles. For some completely ridiculous reason that made no more sense to Derek than Stiles thinking mayonnaise was the bane of existence, the kid had worked his way into his heart.

Actually, that was also the reason. Stiles _wasn’t_ a kid anymore. He went from a skinny, defenseless human wielding a baseball bat at every big bad, to a...well, a more defined, slightly taller human that now carried a couple gambler’s daggers along with his baseball bat. And his hair...he’d grown it out to almost his shoulders in the past year and it was the best decision Derek thinks was ever made. Ever. 

Derek was a twenty-five year old man, who had been staring blankly at his phone screen for the last fifteen minutes, because he had no fucking clue how to do this. He hadn’t dated since he was a teenager --not including the darach, since he was under some pretty strong druid magic for most of that ‘relationship’.

He just wanted to ask Stiles out on a date. After everything Derek had been through, after everything he did on a _daily_ basis as a protector of Beacon Hills...this should have been laughably simple.

What was wrong with him?

“Whatever your phone did, I’m sure it’s sorry,” Peter told him from the spiral staircase, taking note of Derek’s furrowed eyebrows and rigid posture.

Derek turned off his phone screen and shot his uncle a glare. Peter had been staying in the upstairs room of Derek’s loft while his penthouse apartment was being refurbished and Derek was almost ready to pay for him to stay in a hotel. Anywhere but the loft. 

“I don’t think it’s sorry, Der,” Cora said around a mouthful of chips as she walked into the open floor plan from the kitchen. “I think you should continue your telepathic fight with it until it just combusts. Or would it be technopathic? I don’t know--you’re the nerd.” 

Cora had been staying with Derek, too, but nobody was quite sure how long her stay would be. She was torn between going back to Brazil or reclaiming Beacon Hills as home, and Derek decided not to ask too much about it, because it was admittedly nice to have her around. 

When she wasn’t teaming up with Peter to annoy the Hell out of him, that is. 

The two of them came over to Derek and sat on either side of him on the bed he kept in the corner of the room. Cora reached for his phone and he held it out of her reach, which put it directly in front of Peter. His uncle plucked it from his hands and turned it on, the screen immediately lighting up the text chat he had with Stiles.

“Really, Nephew? No password? You’re even worse than Scott.”

“I obviously need one,” Derek growled, taking the phone back.

“So...angrily staring at Stiles’ contact for an undetermined amount of time...you must finally have gotten your head out of your ass and realized you two are in love,” Cora guessed.

“We aren’t.”

“I honestly thought we were all on the same page with that one,” Peter commented. “It’s been excruciatingly obvious since...well, always. We all thought you two would jump at it as soon as he was eighteen. I’m shocked you waited through an entire extra year.”

Derek looked scandalized for a moment, before shaking his head. “I’m just...trying to figure out how to ask him out, I guess.”

Cora gave him a signature Hale smirk and told him, “Just write: I want to know if those moles cover your entire body. Show me after we get dinner this Friday?”

Derek had no idea it was possible to literally choke on air until that moment. 

Yes. A thousand times yes. He absolutely wanted to know if they covered his body. He’d seen them poking out of the collar of his shirts over the years, so he imagined that they were at least splayed across his chest. Gods, he was beautiful.

“Oof,” Peter chuckled, nodding his head in approval at Cora’s suggestion. “My dear, are you sure you’re not my child? Write that, Derek. It’s smooth, sexy, and right to the point.”

“No,” Derek all but groaned, “Seriously, guys, I’m fine. Can you just...go? Somewhere? _Anywhere_ that isn’t here?”

“This isn’t time for jokes, Derek. This is time for you to let your little sister and your uncle help you ask out the man of your dreams, because you have no idea what you’re doing,” Cora pointed out. 

“Maybe this is a bad idea.”

“No, you’re doing this right now. If I have to watch you two pine for each other through one more pack meeting, I will fall back on my old habits and murder you both.”

Derek rolled his eyes at him, then looked down at his phone again. “Okay, how should I word it, then? I’m between ‘Let’s get dinner’ or ‘Do you want to get dinner?’”

“Go with ‘Let’s get dinner’,” Peter told him. “That way you sound assertive and confident.”

Derek nodded and typed it out with slightly trembling fingers. He was about to hit send, when Cora suddenly grabbed his wrist and stopped him.

“That makes you sound a little aggressive,” She explained. “You don’t wanna be the guy that’s like ‘Let’s! Get! Dinner!’ like you’re some sort of caveman or something.”

Derek was about to speak, when the door of the loft opened and Isaac walked in with Malia.

Great.

“Derek is finally making a move,” Peter announced.

“Thank the Gods --I’m ready to stop smelling Stiles reek of desperation around you all the time,” Isaac said as he and Malia joined them on the bed.

“I told you it was getting ridiculous.”

“Thank you, Peter--you’re so helpful,” Derek seethed.

He was just trying to ask Stiles out! Why had this turned into a fucking pack event?

“So, where are we?” Isaac asked, looking over Derek’s shoulder at the phone screen.

“I told him to just say ‘Let’s get dinner’, but Cora apparently thought it was too aggressive,” Peter filled them in.

“You’re supposed to _ask_ him to dinner, not _tell_ him to dinner,” Malia agreed.

“Well, what am I supposed to say, then?” Derek asked, deleting the words he’d typed into the text box.

“Just go with the other one you said. Ask, ‘Do you want to get dinner?’” Cora encouraged.

“Yeah, that’s perfect,” Isaac said.

Derek typed it into the phone, then held it out for everyone to proof-read it.

“Now you sound kinda like a pussy,” Isaac pointed out. 

“What the fuck, guys? This is so dumb,” Derek growled, deleting the message again. He turned to look at Isaac and Malia. “How did you two get together?”

“We got super drunk on aconite-laced whiskey and had sex...then decided we wanted to do it more when we were sober.” Malia shrugged.

“Is that course of action off the table?” Peter asked. “We could get you two drunk and throw you in a room together alone.”

“This is impossible,” Derek groaned, leaning back into the mattress and half-hoping that it would just absorb him and save him from having to send this stupid text.

“Let’s just think for a second,” Isaac recommended. “Stiles is just a person. He isn’t anywhere near as scary as...well, anything we deal with. His longer hair makes him look more like a badass, but he’s still Stiles. He literally flails around whenever you text him--I’ve seen it. It doesn’t matter what you say to him in this text--he’ll jump at the chance to date you. He’s been waiting since he was fifteen.”

“Seriously, just ask him!” Cora urged, pointing at the phone insistently. “‘Hey, Stiles. Dinner this weekend would be fun, yeah?’”

“Just remember that the last thing you wanna be is the overbearing masculine guy that’s like ‘Let’s get dinner, Bitch! I’m the breadwinner!’ As long as you don’t say that, you’re fine,” Isaac said. “Because Stiles is exactly the kind of guy that will be stubborn and probably react stupidly if you try to ‘I am the Alpha’ him, even though he secretly thinks it’s hot.”

“He gives off major bratty bottom vibes, huh?” Peter asked.

“I totally thought that the second I met him,” Cora agreed.

“That means that the assertiveness would be good, though,” Malia pointed out. “So, Derek should just tell him to go out with him and Stiles will throw a minor tantrum and then show up on the date and want sex. Isn’t that the goal?”

“I’m gonna just ask Chris Argent to shoot me with a wolfsbane bullet, instead," Derek decided.

“Don’t be dramatic--that’s Peter’s thing.” Cora waved him off. “Just...be polite.”

Isaac leaned forward and offered, “Say ‘Dinner would be something that I would enjoy taking you to, if you were also interested in attending the meal.’” 

“Yes, the more words, the better,” Malia agreed, a smile forming on her lips. “No, wait! Say ‘I would like nothing more than to take you to the finest restaurant in town for a lovely meal that we call dinner, Good Sir.’”

“This isn’t a damn Jane Austen novel, Malia!”

“You know who that is?” Peter asked Derek, surprised. “I’m so proud of you.”

“You know what--fuck this!” Cora exclaimed. “He’s just a guy. This isn’t a big deal. Say ‘Dinner tomorrow night. 7pm. Take it or leave it, bitch .”

“Yeah, he’s obviously playing games now,” Isaac said, going along with Cora’s energy.

“Sign it, seal it, deliver it,” Malia instructed. “I don’t know why guys are so difficult all the time!”

“I’m not going to say that.”

“Yeah, definitely don’t say that.” Peter shook his head at them.

Derek clutched his phone tightly in his hand. “Why is it so hard to tell Stiles I want to take him out on a date? How can I trust him with my life all the time, exorcise a literal demon from him, fight beside him for _years_ , be his packmate, and _still_ be too fucking scared to just hit send?”

Everyone froze as a soft _woosh_ sound came from the phone and they looked down at it with wide eyes.

“Holy shit,” Derek breathed. “What did I send?”

Cora grabbed the phone and said, “It’s a voice message.”

_“-- definitely don’t say that.”_

_“Why is it so hard to tell Stiles I want to take him out on a date? How can I trust him with my life all the time, exorcise a literal demon from him, fight beside him for_ years _, be his packmate, and_ still _be too fucking scared to just hit send?”_

They were all silent for a few moments as the situation sunk in, but Derek’s text tone went off before they had a chance to really panic. 

Cora looked down at the phone and read aloud, “You literally just had to ask, Sourwolf. 6p tomorrow?”

Peter clapped Derek on the shoulder and grinned. “Don’t wait another half an hour to respond, please.”

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know if you enjoyed it :)
> 
> [inspired by a tiktok by @emersonstevie]


End file.
